What’s in a Name?

In April ’09, I sent an update to our family containing the following excerpt, which explains it all. It became the first post of a personal blog I continued to write while the kids were little called Rock, Paper…Diaper? Here is how it got it’s name.

“I’ve been duped.  Outwitted.  Outplayed.  Out-parented, even.  Our daughter has been sleeping through the night for a while now.  I don’t mind so much on the rare night she wakes up hungry/thirsty, but last night I realized I was being woefully naïve regarding how those nights play out. 

Hearing our little angel wake up, I gallantly offered my husband the usual options:  ‘Do you want to change her diaper or fix her bottle?’  He is very helpful, and offering him a choice is nicer than playing Rock, Paper, Scissors for diaper duty.  My hubby, who is notorious for being completely incoherent if woken before 3 a.m., groggily mumbled his usual half-conscious, ‘Diaper.’  Mind you; this is a man who, during the day, will rarely, if ever, select ‘diaper,’ no matter the opposing option.  Hmm…. 

Maybe it’s because our little lass tends to poop only during the day, so the chance of a nasty encounter at night is relatively low.  Perhaps he’s being nice at night or is too out of it to care.  (Here’s where my naivete came into play.)  As Chris handed our fresh-bottomed rug rat over, it finally hit me. 

Oh, sugar.  I’ve been so stupid!!!  ‘Diaper’ is less fun and potentially much messier, but also the odds-on favorite for a quick return to Sleepyland.  While I sat awake in bed with a little monkey drinking her bottle, the sly fox who dares to share my foxhole slunk into our bed, laid his not-so-foggy-after-all head on his pillow, and closed his eyes.  I disgustedly told our girl, ‘Your daddy chooses ‘diaper’ ’cause he gets to go back to sleep sooner.’ 

The filthy, rotten scoundrel beside me grinned behind closed eyes and said, ‘Rock, paper, diaper.’  Indeed, sir.  And Game, Set, Match to the gentleman, I might add.  Well-played, you dirty rat, well-played.

<sigh>  And so it began…”

Ever have a moment when your partner outfoxed you? Sound off in the comments below!