Remember the Me I Am Today In October 2012, my hubby and I decided to take a quick get-away to Captiva Island, Florida. We’d never done anything of the sort, and a three-day jaunt down and back was all we could manage with little ones aged four and two at home. Still, we were excited to get a bit of time together. One evening, we sat watching the stunning sunset compliments of Hurricane Sandy and her chaos on the Atlantic side just days
Author: Jen Telger
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She There come these moments in every mom’s life (or so I assume, if only because I steadfastly refuse to accept that it is only in mine) when she finds herself lost, standing gape-mouthed, shell-shocked, mud-smeared, and barefoot in the middle of a sticky-hot domestic jungle and feeling smothered as she tries to breathe in a syrupy fug of vertigo-inducing exhaustion, self-doubt, unearned guilt, humble appreciation, and fierce unconditional love for the creatures who inhabit such a place. Having walked freely and willingly
Sense This To say the past several months have been rough would be to tell a half-truth. No, it would be to tell a one-sixteenth truth. Or maybe there’s a fractional exponent in there somewhere, I can’t really tell. And while it could always be worse, it’s bad enough, thank you very much, and Murphy and his laws can kindly move along from our little abode. But I won’t regale you with the trials and tribulations of the Telger household other than to
Holy Smokes, You Guys! Holy smokes, you guys! A while back, my brother fell in love with my little half-sister while we were visiting my breeder. Well, like my Uncle E said, he’d better never fall in love with a car, ‘cuz Mom and Dad did a thing. A BIG thing. They are the sneakiest, most devious, awesome, psycho, wonderful Mom and Dad on the planet! So, on Sunday, we all hopped in the car to go to Andrea’s to “play with the
My Name is Cricket, and I’m a Chewer My name is Cricket and I’m a chewer. There, I said it. Mom says it will help me work toward stopping, but I don’t wanna stop. I LIKE to chew. It feels amaze-a-doodles on my gums! She’s tried giving me special things to chew on – some of which are acceptable – but I still like my plan better, which is to gnaw on whatever I can reach. I think we’re at an in…im…impasse. Yeah,
Got My First Bath Got my first bath with my new family last night. I’m all clean and lovely again, but getting to this point wasn’t my best thing ever. On the Big Scary scale, it was a solid 7.5. I have to say, it was a little weird seeing my brother and sister put on their swimming suits and get into our bathtub. It should have tipped me right off that something was a little hinky. Then again, they do
I Ate a Mushroom – Whoopsie! I ate a mushroom. Whoopsie! I strongly recommend against doing the same. If you’re mom catches you – and my mom ALWAYS catches me – she’ll make you go to Dr. Chris and Dr. Chris will make you upchuck. She gives you this nasty stuff that makes your tummy do somersaults and not the good kind. But that’s not even the worst part (though it is pretty bad, I’ll tell you that
My Vet Shot Me Today My vet shot me today. Wait…no. Mom says I say that wrong. I’m supposed to say, “my vet gave me a shot,” but I don’t see what difference it really makes. It sure felt like she shot me. She called it “Distemper,” which also doesn’t make any sense ‘cuz it ticked me RIGHT off. My temper was not “dis” anything. I even bared my teeth at her and I’ve never done that to
Congrats, Graduate by Jen Telger Here we are, folks, about to enter another fantastic season. Not spring, of course, when Mother Nature shows off glorious cherry and magnolia blossoms on over-wintered branches. No, I’m talking about high school graduation season. That wonderful time of year when kids throw caps and parties, and parents throw cash and humble-brags, flexing, trying to impress upon us how much their child deserves to drive a fancier car than that of his or her mother. That time of
The Day the ‘Heavy Seven’ Met Their Match by Jen Telger Back in 2016, I had a day that will live in infamy. I know, I know, that sounds overly dramatic. Read on. It’s been an interesting day. I say that as I lay in bed, laptop on my lap, brownie/ice cream/chocolate sauce in my tummy, and both kids asleep. I say that because the day is over. I say that because it was a day that made me laugh out loud at